MONEY AND MARITAL TRUSTby EnRichment Place Clinicians on 06/22/15
It is true that I've counseled a number of couples regarding finances in their marriage due to the fact that money is so often a sore spot for couples. I've certainly even agreed with some couples that things would work out best if they kept certain aspects of their finances separate. But the truth is that this negates the very idea of marital partnership in a sense. A foundational principle in marriage is trust. That has become distorted over time and in have pranced ideas such as prenups and separate bank accounts. However, what happened to the vow that "with all my worldly goods I do endow".
I do understand that not every spouse is fiscally responsible and partners won't always agree to how funds should be allocated. Sometimes couples are polar opposites in their spending habits. Money could just be a symbol of other trust issues that exist in the relationship. That's where speaking with a good financial advisor and seeking the help of marriage therapy can be helpful. The idea isn't to avoid the issues that test the trust in a marriage, such as money, but to face them head on and seek the needed assistance when necessary.
Tiwana Bell, LCSW